CELEBIRTY JEOPARDY SNL Skit
show begins and music, we all enter and take places)
WELCOME TO CELEBIRTY JEOPARDY. ONCE AGAIN I’M GOING TO RECOMMEND TO OUR VIEWERS
TO WATCH SOMETHING ELSE… THAT Said, let get this over with.
Deputy Barney Fife IS IN FIRST PLACE WITH $-8000
Barney: Alex, I’m tellin ya, I’m gonna Nip this thing in the
Trebek: Next we have Gov Sarah Palin
Sarah: That’s right, you betcha (wink, check click, point)
T: RIIIIGHT. AND FINALLY WITH $-120,000
You’ll Rue the day you crossed me TReBEk! You can’t make me pay that!
Trebek: FANTASTIC. Once again I’ll remind you all you are
playing for charity and you don’t have to pay anything!
Trebek: Our categories are The Number 10, Foods that end in “amburger”, Famous Titles, Batman
or Robin, and Animal Sounds
T: Mr Connery SINCE YOU ARE in Last place YOU GET TO PICK
Sean: I’LL TAKE FAMOUS TITLES FOR $400
T: AND THE ANSWER IS “THIS FAMOUS MOVIE TITLE IS TAKEN FROM
tHE NAME OF THE BOOK ‘GONE WITH THE WIND’.”
T: Barney Fife
Barney: WHAT IS Rocky 12.
I’LL TAKE foods that end in Amburger FOR 1 MILLION
Trebek: THAT’S NOT THE RIGHT ANSWER
Trebek: Mrs Palin
Sarah: Who is Russia?
T: WRONG AGAIN
Sarah: No seriously who are they? I keep hearing about them
and I can see them from my back yard, but who are they anyways??
Trebek: Okay. Mr Connery.
Sean: [ laughs ] Yeah, what do ya want?
Alex Trebek: You buzzed in!
Sean: No I didn’t.
Alex: Yes you did!
Sean: Yeah, well, that’s your opinion.
Alex Trebek: I hate my job. The answer was GONE WITH THE WIND… GONE WITH
Sean: You wouldn’t be so smart if you didn’t have those
cards to read from Trebek
it’s your board Mrs. Palin.
Sarah: Oh yeah you betcha Alex I’m like a Pit-bull
with lipstick on so I’ll take ‘Batman or Robin’ for 400.
Trebek: (shakes head) And the
answer is…(board shows picture of Batman, clearly) Is this Batman, or Robin?
Trebek: Mr Fife
Barney: I’m gonna nip this one
in the bud. I know this one! That’s Robin!
Alex Trebek: No. So since it’s
not Robin, that leaves only one correct answer.
Trebek: Mrs. Palin
Sarah: WHO is Robin?
Alex Trebek: Amazing. Sean
Sean Connery: WHAT is Robin? Now
then, I’ll take “Batman or Robin” for 800.
Alex Trebek: No, that’s the wrong!
Trebek: ALL RIGHT Barney
THE BOARD IS YOURS. I’LL PICK A CATEGORY FOR YOU. HOW ABOUT THE NUMBER 10 FOR
$200. THE CORRECT RESPONSE TO EVERY
QUESTION IN THIS CATEGORY IS 10. WHEN I
STOP TALKING JUST SAY 10. OKAY LET’S
GIVE IT A SHOT. THIS IS HOW MANY
fingers YOU HAVE.
Barney: that’s the # of bullets Andy gave me. See (pulls
bullet from pocket) See cause in Mayberry we have a lot of criminals that are
afraid of me just by my reputation…
DING DING Ding
T: SORRY TIMES UP. THE ANSWER WAS 10. YOU HAVE 10 FINGERS.
T: ALLRIGHTY THEN… Mr Connery YOUR TURN TO PICK A CATEGORY.
C: I’LL TAKE ANIMAL SOUND FOR $600
T: THIS IS THE SOUND
A DOGGY MAKES
T: Shawn Connery
T: Mrs. Palin
Sarah: WHO IS AH… SCOOBY DOO
Sarah: YAH THAT WAS A FUNNY DOG SCOOBY DOO. HE DROVE AROUND
IN A VAN AND SOLVED MYSTERIES.
T: THAT IS INCORRECT
Barney: NO THAT’S CORRECT. I REMEMBER HE HAD A FRIEND
Trebek: WHAT’S GOING ON…What’s wrong with you people?! OKAY
LET’S JUST MOVE ON TO FINAL JEOPARDY.
THE CATEGORY IS… YA KNOW WHAT, FORGET IT. JUST WRITE DOWN WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW
IT COULD BE St
Andrews, OR A GAME
SHOW, OR EARTH, OR THE WORD HERE.
OKAY LET’S GET THIS OVER WITH
Deputy Fife YOU WROTE DOWN:
AND YOU WAGERED: In the Bud
T: I FEEL LIKE I WANT TO PUNCH YOU.
Mrs. Palin: YOU WROTE DOWN:
AND SHE WAGERED: Wink
T: Mr Bond, you wrote down… Indoors. Indoors!
GOOD googley moogley ARE WE RECORDING THIS (LOOKING AROUND)
AND YOU WAGERED: I
WELL THAT’S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE FOR TODAY. I’M GOING HOME AND slamming my head in the